Inside: When my little girl’s bad dream gave me a wake-up call about worry. ~
One night many years ago, I woke up suddenly to find my daughter Molly’s little face peering at me from just beyond the mattress. She’d had a bad dream and needed some comfort.
In her dream, her bike was across the street by the neighbor’s house. Randy was working in the garage, presumably with the door wide open, and she had gone somewhere with me and older sister Lilly.
I was confused, and not only because I had just been roused from a deep sleep. What on earth was so scary about the scene she had just described?
Her Alarming Answer
“What if someone steals the bike?” she whispered in my ear.
Oh.
The “scary” part of her dream was her fear that someone might steal her bike, even though that was highly unlikely.
Suddenly, I was wide awake.
I worried a lot as a child and young adult. It was so bad that my childhood nickname, compliments of my five older siblings, was “Worry Busby.”
Ironically, or perhaps not, freedom from that stranglehold came as I prayed for God’s will, not mine, to be done when Randy and I were dealing with infertility. As it turned out, God’s will for our family included the miracle of two adoptions, and, for me, of being released from my lifelong struggle with worry.
My Wake-Up Call
Even at the ripe old age of 9, Molly was a planner. She always thought ahead and liked to have contingencies for every situation.
But that night, planning hadn’t invaded her dreams; worry had. And her appearance in my room that night was a wake-up call, in more ways than one.
As I recall, it happened during a stressful season when I had slipped back into my old habit and was agonizing about an insurance issue that was beyond my control.
I can’t prove that my daughter was troubled about possibly losing her bike in her dream because I was worrying about insurance. Given my history, though, the timing hardly seemed coincidental. Kids pick up vibes from their parents, and the ones emanating from me during that time were especially anxious.
Hence, the wakeup call.
When Worries Loom
As much as I am able, as long as I live, I must be vigilant about not passing on to my children something that had been so debilitating in my own life. Even now that my daughters are both young adults—or perhaps especially because they are.
Time and again, I return to the petition that helps me whenever fear starts creeping in. “Not my will, but yours be done.” I pray.
Over and over, I repeat the words Jesus uttered in the garden just before his crucifixion until the worry flees and God’s peace floods my soul once again.
That night all those years ago, I took my daughter back to bed armed with hugs and the assurance that Daddy would never let anyone take her bike right out from under his nose. And I returned to sleep myself, eternally grateful that my own heavenly Father “has not given [me] a spirit of fear, but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.” (2 Timothy 1:7)
• • •
What are some practical or helpful ways that you have found to battle worry or fear during any season of your life? Please share in the comments.
♥ Lois
As much as I am able, as long as I live, I must be vigilant about not passing on to my children something that had been so debilitating in my own life. Share on X Time and again, I return to the petition that helps me whenever fear starts creeping in. “Not my will, but yours be done.” I pray. Share on XP.S. I’m linking up this week with InstaEncouragements and Let’s Have Coffee.
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14 comments
I can see how that was a wake up call. I too was a heavy worrier. It seemed to be that as I matured in Christ the less I worried. And a few years ago when mindfulness was my WOTY I began some breathings like breathe in on Je and out on sus. Or breathe in Jesus breath out worry. If my mind is running like squirrels at bed I sing worship songs to Him. Or ask the Holy Spirit to calm my chaotic mind so I can focus on Jesus.
I so appreciate you sharing this with Sweet Tea & Friends this month Sweet friend. I’m so happy you’re here.
Paula, I love the simple practices you have in place to redirect your mind when worries threaten. And what a blessing to be able to look back and see how you’ve matured in Christ. ❤️
I love that prayer, and this is such a convicting story. We pass things on so easily without meaning to. I love that the Lord used your recognition of this to help you grow in Him and help you as a parent. Thanks for sharing, friend!
Thanks so much, Bethany. It’s a lesson that endures to this day, for sure! Hugs, friend.
When concerned or anxious when I was a new Christian I would quote Psalm 91 & it’s well marked in my Bible. Now when those annoying buzzing concerns try to visit I just ask the Lord to be with me & they fly away.
Visiting from Joanne’s today where we’re sitting together. 😊
Blessings, Jennifer
I love that, Jennifer! ❤️
Interesting this should come up this week when just last week I had a severe bout of anxiety–and over nothing major. I’ve found that, for me, anxiety is like selfishness in that it may be conquered or resisted, but not once-for-all. It will come up again, and I have to keep reminding myself of the truths I’ve learned before.
One problem I wrestle with in praying, “Not my will, but Yours be done,” is that I might not like what His will entails. It might hurt or be frustrating or not make sense. But I don’t suppose Jeremiah or Joseph or Paul or Jesus “liked” the hard things that happened to them, either. It helps me to remember God’s grace will be there for trials when we need them, not when we imagine them.
The day after the incident last week, a verse in my Daily Light on the Daily Path devotional was Palm 142:3: “When my spirit was overwhelmed within me, Then You knew my path.” That was exactly how I had felt–overwhelmed. It blessed and touched me so much that God brought that verse just when I needed it.
Something that helps me came from an old devotional book from F. B. Meyer years ago. We often quote Phil. 4:6-7, about not being anxious, praying, and the peace of God, by itself. Meyer pointed out that the phrase right before that is, “The Lord is at hand.” How had I never noticed that or connected those verses before? That’s why we can rest in Him and be at peace–He is at hand.
One more–sorry for a long reply–from a book by Ed Welch called Running Scared. He said instead of running from your fears and what-ifs, turn around and face them. Ask, “What’s the worst thing that can happen?” if that fear becomes reality. No matter what it is, God will be there and give grace to help in time of need.
Barbara, I appreciate your wisdom so much. I love that God brought you that verse about your spirit being overwhelmed just at the right time. He is so kind to give us such gentle reminders of His presence, isn’t He? And the order of the wording in Philippians is profound. ❤️
From a fellow worrier – repeating 2 Timothy 1:7 over and over (and loudly) until I believed it, has dispelled many a fear for me. I so agree, we need to be vigilant, and I would add deliberate and intentional, in fighting off worrying. I wish it were a one and done sort of thing, but alas, it isn’t. But it has taught me to turn to God and His Word more quickly.
Amen to being deliberate and intentional about this, Joanne. Aren’t you thankful when you can look back and see that you are learning to “turn to God and His Word more quickly”? I’m glad baby steps are still steps!
Lois, one of my biggest takeaways from your book, Infertility–Finding God’s Peace in the Journey, was your learning to seek God’s will, not your own. It still lingers in my heart. I still worry too much, but I try to remember God is in control no matter what and His will is best. Often in my life I have prayed the Serenity Prayer – “God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference.” Love and blessings to you!
Trudy, I love the Serenity Prayer too. You’re right—“God is in control no matter what and His will is best.” I’m glad we can remind each other of truths like this. Love and hugs to you, dear friend.
This is a timely reminder for me, Lois. I’ve awoken frequently in the middle of the night worrying about all kinds of things. Some of those things are pretty minor and some are big, like losing my husband, but no matter what the worry is, I feel guilty that I’m not trusting. I like your response to repeat Jesus’s prayer in the garden. I’ve been trying to remind myself that I can’t do anything about any of it, but God can and finish with a renewed trust that He has all of it. And if something bad does happen, He’s still got me (and has a plan). I think your way is a lot more succinct than what I’ve been doing. I’ll have to give it a try next try.
Ashley, I’m sorry for those middle-of-the-night worry spells and the guilt they trigger. You are reminding yourself of what’s true, which is what Philippians tells us to do, right? But I hope praying for God’s will helps too. ❤️