Share Four Somethings: September 2023

Inside: What the empty nest has been like so far, a friend’s devotional series on Psalm 121, learning to provide my own tech support, and the joy of helping a loved one mark items off her to-do list. ~

Before my daughters left for college, I asked each of them for a list of their favorite meals and desserts.

I knew it would be a while before they’d have home cooking again, so I thought I’d fill them up one last time with butter chicken, cilantro lime rice, flourless chocolate cake and other frequently requested dishes. (Granted, one is far less interested in what she eats than the other, but a semester of cafeteria food might change even her mind about home cooking.)

Lilly’s been in Spain for about a month now, and Molly’s been gone a few weeks longer than that. At first, I kept expecting them to come downstairs around the time they’d normally to go to work. I’d check the clock in the afternoon or evening, wondering if they were on their way home yet.

It was disconcerting, to say the least.

It Might Sound Odd, But …

By now I’m largely used to their absence. While I miss them, it’s been oddly helpful to remember that they’re just away from home, not gone forever.

Maybe I feel this way because I’m missing my parents even more now. I wish I could share with them all that my daughters are seeing, doing and experiencing. But I can’t tell my mom and dad anything—not one single thing.

I can still talk to the girls, however. They’re not here in person, but we’re connected—almost more than before.

Thanks to WhatsApp, FaceTime, iMessages and even Google Docs, we can see each other as we talk, send each other voice and text messages, and edit writing assignments at the same time.

Living Their Best Lives

There may be days when they want to chuck everything and come home. For now, though, they seem to be living their best lives.

They’re making friends. Working through the challenges of flight delays, missing luggage and Covid at college. Stretching and growing academically. Visiting (in Lilly’s case) one amazing architectural wonder after another.

It all makes my mama heart happy, even on the days when I long for an in-person conversation or wish I could envelop them both in a big hug.

We’ll be able to do that before we know it, though, because it’s already the end of September. Which here at the blog means it’s time to link up with Jennifer for another Share Four Somethings. Starting with …

• Something Loved

Randy and I went to North Dakota earlier this month to visit his mom. While we were there, we helped her with some projects that had been on her to-do list for a while.

Randy installed 10 new LED lights in her garage, brightening up the place considerably. I weeded and mulched a couple of flowerbeds that were full of Bermuda grass and other weeds.

I enjoy this kind of work, especially when I know Randy is busy in the nearby garage and I can see my mother-in-law across the yard as she harvests tomatoes and rhubarb.

I wish I had taken before and after pictures, because it was quite a transformation. But even without photos, I love knowing a few gardening projects are done and, hopefully, will remain free of weeds until I can return and touch them up in the spring.

• Something Read

I memorized Psalm 121 as a kid in Sunday school. It’s helped me through some hard times and remains a favorite scripture to this day. So when my good friend Bethany asked if I would contribute a prayer to her 30-day devotional series on this psalm, I said yes immediately.

Bethany introduced the “I’m Tired, Lord” series like this:

Tired minds tend to go in loops. You start with one thought, get lost on the way to the next, and come back to where you started. 

Each day for the next 30 days, I’ll post a series of short devotions that are meant to help your tired thought loop come back again and again to God’s compassionate and consistent care for you.

In Him, you’ll find what you need. Even if you can’t sleep. Even if you really need sleep or just a nice long vacation. Even if you’ve slept, but struggle to get real rest.

The entire series is wonderful, and you can find it here, on Bethany’s blog. My prayer is the post for Day 22.

• Something Learned

When Molly went to college, I lost my primary source of in-person tech support. As a result, when I discovered the contact page here on the blog had disappeared somehow, I didn’t know what to do.

I also was launching my Help for Parent Loss resource page, and I was having trouble making that show up where it was supposed to be.

Fortunately for me,“There’s nothing new under the sun” applies to website issues.

Chances are pretty good that someone out there has had the same problem and has either written a blog post or made a video about it. In fact, I’ve found the best way to get help for this kind of thing is to ask Google, rather than using the “help” feature of whatever program or app I’m using.

By asking a few straightforward questions and following some easy directions, I was able to redo my contact page and launch Help for Parent Loss without losing anything or crashing my website. Turns out, you can teach a middle-aged lady a new trick every now and then.

• Something Ahead

I’m in Wisconsin this week, spending time with my sister and aunt. It’s been a busy month, travel-wise, which doesn’t leave much time for focused writing.

Happily, October’s schedule is wide open. I’m looking forward to writing every day—hopefully completing another batch of half-written blog posts, making one more round of edits on my parent loss book project, and keeping up with curating content for the Remembering Our Parents Instagram community.

Speaking of Remembering Our Parents, if you’ve lost your mom or dad (or both), I’d love for you to check it out here. The reader stories we’ve posted so far have been absolutely wonderful, and we would welcome yours too.

• • •

Now it’s your turn. Has September been as busy for you as it has been for me? What have you been loving, reading or learning this month? Please share in the comments.

♥ Lois

P.S. I’m linking up this week with sharefoursomethings, Inspire Me Monday, #tellhisstory, InstaEncouragements, Let’s Have Coffee and Grace & Truth.