Inside: Younger women have much to learn from older saints who have lived through hard times and yet still radiate joy at every turn. ~
We hear a lot about trauma these days. Much of it is not what we would have called trauma five or 10 years ago.
Whether we consider this development to be positive, unhelpful or somewhere in between, it’s clear the narratives surrounding the issue are constantly evolving and often vary depending on age.
Ask a Millennial or Gen-Z believer about the trauma in her life. Then turn around and ask an 80- or 90-year-old who has been following Jesus for many decades the same question. I can’t say this with 100 percent certainty, but you will probably get vastly different answers.
Why the Difference?
Some of this relates to personality, of course. Also to semantics and generational differences regarding how comfortable we are speaking about the hard things in life.
Even so, I think younger women (including Gen-Xers like me) could learn a great deal from much older Christians, especially the ones who radiate joy at every turn.
Chances are, these precious saints have faced a variety of challenges in their lives. Some were born in the Great Depression; many lived through World War II and all sorts of national upheaval over the years.
They might not be accustomed to talking about it. But they also may have experienced personal trials and losses that might be considered traumatic today, and for good reason.
Focusing on God
Even so, as they get closer to the ends of their lives, they choose to focus on God’s love and grace, on His goodness and provision, rather than on anything negative. Again, this might be a generational thing. But I also think it helps explain why they’ve been able to maintain such a joyful spirit all these years.
Attitude may not be everything, but it is something—this much is true.
I’m “only” 53, so I don’t spend a lot of time thinking about dying. I do ponder what I want to be like as I get older, though. Especially if I am fortunate enough to live to be very old.
Blessing After Blessing
Several weeks ago, I read a blog post about an 89-year-old woman who had been hospitalized for a serious illness right before Christmas. The blogger, Melissa Edgington, was amazed at how her friend described her time in the hospital.
“She told me about how she met Jesus there, in the days leading up to His birthday,” Melissa wrote here. “He sent a steady stream of doctors, nurses, and support staff to her side to show His love to her in personal ways. …
“She insisted that this experience was blessing after blessing after blessing,” Melissa added. “She knew that God had placed her exactly where she needed to be to know His love in a very tangible way through the caring hands of the people He created.”
Another Example
As I read this story, I couldn’t help but think of my own Aunt Renate. Now 93, she radiates the same kind of contentment and peace Melissa observed in her elderly friend.
I recently shared with Aunt Renate a piece I had written that referred to Romans 8:28—the truth that all things work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to His purpose. She told me she’s always believed the truth of that scripture, but each day she appreciates it more.
“All the things that have happened to me are truly because of God’s great love,” she wrote in an email. “If I had known how good they all are for me, I would have wanted them to happen. God is so good.”
That sort of perspective doesn’t come from constantly ruminating on all the bad things—past, present or future—in the world or in our lives. It comes from meditating on God’s character, thanking Him for His provision, trusting in His mercy and grace.
Walking Home Well
No matter how old we are, our long walk home to heaven will likely include some degree of grief and pain. But when I think about Aunt Renate and Melissa’s friend, I’m hopeful that it doesn’t have to be a miserable journey.
I don’t know if I’ll live to be 93. If I do, though, I hope Aunt Renate’s recent words to me will be the same words I freely share with others.
“I have had and am having a wonderful life,” she said. “I stand on all of God’s wonderful promises.”
♥ Lois
Younger women (including Gen-Xers like me) could learn a great deal from much older Christians, especially the ones who radiate joy at every turn. Click To Tweet Our long walk home to heaven will likely include some degree of grief and pain. But it doesn’t have to be a miserable journey. Click To TweetP.S. I’m linking up this week with #tellhisstory, InstaEncouragements, Let’s Have Coffee and Grace & Truth.
16 comments
There is something to be said about being with those who are older than myself. Their wisdom, experiences, strength, courage, and joy in sharing fill my soul with a desire to age well. The sheer joy which is evident in Aunt Renate’s face is just precious. May I join her in standing on all God’s wonderful promises for all of my life for this post reminded me this morning how “the joy of the Lord is our strength.” Blessings friend!
Amen, Joanne! And now you have reminded me of how my Aunt Kay and Uncle Dom would play and sing together: “the joy of the Lord is my strength.” That’s another example of sheer joy and aging well. 🙂
This is really sweet, Lois. I hope to be standing on God’s promises with hope and joy as I grow older too!
Thanks, Bethany. I have no doubt you will be doing exactly that, my friend.
Even though I’m a great grandmother Lois, I love learning from those older than I. God is gracious at every age & stage of our lives, we just need to recognise it. And those who have travelled this path longer & are further ahead can help us to see His glory & grace at every bend.
Blessings, Jennifer
Amen, Jennifer! And I did not know you were a GREAT-grandmother! 🙂
I love the perspective of these older ladies whose testimonies you share here, Lois. To me it’s one of those who have learned to trust Jesus with their lives, relinquishing their desired outcomes choosing rather to trust His good choices for them.
I want grow old with that heart attitude, Donna … and I know you do as well. Hugs, friend.
I often play these conversations in my mind, too, about the differences in generations. I remember when I was younger, and the the generation above me wondering about us, too. lol. I appreciate your encouragement here for us to ponder how to grow into the older people we want to be. Thank you for your wisdom, Lois.
I know what you mean about each generation wondering about the generation after it, Lisa. It made me feel really old the first time I realized I was doing this myself! Good to hear from you, friend.
When I read about WWII, the Depression, and similar events in history, I often wonder how people made it through to lead anything like a normal life. Probably some did suffer undiagnosed mental health issues, or kept such things hidden. But there does seem to be—not a stoicism, but an acceptance that life had its troubles but we make the best of things and move on. My mother-in-law had several issues growing up–physical problems from a premature birth before the technology to help such cases, a demanding, unloving mother, a husband who didn’t share her faith for many years. She didn’t deny or minimize those things, but her hope was in the Lord.
People in general seem more mentally fragile these days, and I have often wondered why.
I think you’re right, Barbara … people years ago were more accepting of the fact that life is hard. And also, perhaps, more willing to trust that God would give them the grace and strength to handle whatever came along? I’m guessing are many reasons why people are more fragile, but that’s probably a conversation for another day!
I have noticed over the years that the people I most admire and want to emulate have all suffered in some way. Nothing is wasted.
I’ve noticed the same thing, Michele.
I’ve been slowly realizing that I am well on my way to being that ‘older’ Christian …
Maybe on your way, but not there yet! In my current way of looking at things, old is over 80. When I’m 70, though, it will probably be 95! 🙂