A year or two ago, I heard a song on the radio a lot—a prayer for God to “make me broken.”
I understand why such a plea is important, and I appreciate the sincerity with which it is offered.
But while many people may find those words just right for them, I don’t pray that way much.
I’ve been broken. I am broken. Not in a dramatic, visible way, but broken nonetheless.
I’ve been mended in some places, but I’m still broken in others. And I don’t sing that song because the brokenness that I’ve experienced happened without me asking for it.
Some of it, I believe, was ordained by a heavenly Father who loves me and knows what I need far better than I do.
Some of it was a direct result of my own frailties and failures.
And some of it simply came with the territory of being a follower of Jesus on a fallen planet. In this world, you will have trouble, Jesus promised. And while we might wish for an exception in this case, He does keep His promises.
In retrospect, I can point to positive outcomes, things that may not have happened without the dry, dark times. Looking back, I can see growth, even a bit of transformation here and there. For that, I am truly thankful.
But my belief in a sovereign God leads me to think that He will accomplish His desires for me with or without my begging for brokenness. I’m not less spiritual, less devoted or less committed because I don’t want pray that way. Nor am I more of any of that if I do.
So for now, I’ll let other people sing pleas for brokenness. And I’ll pray for still others who are—right this minute—being broken in ways they never could have imagined, through circumstances they never would have chosen.
“The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” (Psalm 34:18)