Some Back-to-School Reminders For My Girls (and Me)

Dear Lilly and Molly,

Here it is, almost time to head back to school after a summer that went by entirely too fast. There will be new teachers and new routines, just as there always are when a school year starts. But there also will be a degree of comfort, for both you and me.

first day of school

At this point in your educational careers, you each are a part of the oldest groups at your respective schools. Next year, when Lilly goes to high school and Molly enters middle school, things will be very different for both of you. You’ll make new friends and find your way, just as you did when you moved to a new elementary school together a few years ago. But it will be an adjustment, all the way around.

I have a feeling that this year, your last in these familiar surroundings, will be a good one for both of you. But as we gather school supplies, shop for new jeans and find out which friends will be in your classes, I want to pass on some bits of wisdom I hope you’ll keep in mind in the coming months.

Yes, you’ve heard some of this beforesome of it more than once, even. But it’s important stuff, what I’m about to say, so it bears repeating.

I didn’t really understand most of this when I was your age, certainly not in a way that I could articulate. But just because I didn’t grasp it back then doesn’t mean it won’t help you now. And just because I’m the one sharing it doesn’t mean it’s only for you. I need to remember plenty of these insights too, maybe even more than you.

1. Be the kind of person you like to be around.

2. If people you want to like you are not nice (to you or to others), move on. Always be kind, but don’t purposely choose friends who treat people badly.

3. When faced with a hard choice, think about how it will affect your life later, not just how you feel now.

4. When you get upset about something, ask yourself, “In 10 years (or possibly even next week), who’s going to give a rip?”

5. People often put others down simply to make themselves feel better.

6. When someone you know starts acting differently, there might be a reason that has nothing to do with you. Never forget: hurting people hurt people.

7. Remember who you are (and to Whom you belong).

8. Be who you are. Trying to be someone else is very stressful.

9. The world does not revolve around you.

10. I love you. I’m with you. I’m for you.

11. And so is God.

Much love,


(I’m linking up this week with Kelly Balarie at #RaRaLinkup, Jennifer Dukes Lee at #TellHisStory and Holley Gerth at Coffee for Your Heart.)

12 Responses to Some Back-to-School Reminders For My Girls (and Me)

  1. karen says:

    Oh my goodness, Lois! Mary McCully shared your blog today on her wall, and it was as if a GIANT God hug came wrapping around me this morning when your name came up! Girlfriend, God has kept you and your family on my heart to pray for all these years since I read your transcript before it was published..All these years praying for you. The girls..For Kansas as Randy and Lois Flowers make a home there read Lilly and Molly are young women almost in high school! Shouldn’t they still be wrapped in those two little quilts I made so long ago? I’m thinking those 2 quilts, now can share , in and of themselves, memories of your beautiful daughters life’s as they love, and are loved by you and our Heavenly Father looking forward today to start reading your blog from the start , my special friend, and ” prayed for recipient ” of Gods amazing Grace..

    • Lois Flowers says:

      I’m so glad Mary shared my blog on her page today, Karen. Your encouraging words have done me a world of good! I hope you can meet Lilly and Molly someday … what a blessing that would be for all of us!

  2. Christi Gee says:

    I loved getting this in my inbox and finally made it over here to tell you!

    When my kids were younger, I typed out letters to them that are now yellowed in their baby books. My baby even goes back and reads them at times. I never thought about how wonderful a blog is for this purpose. But these words will be here ~ now ~ and later for them to be reminded of their faithful mom (and how SMART she was ~ they just didn’t realize it!)

    Love your heart, sweet sister. And love knowing more about you through how you love your girls.

    • Lois Flowers says:

      Christi, I love that your daughter enjoys reading those yellowed letters … aren’t you glad you wrote them? 🙂 One of my girls seems to appreciate such things more than the other (maybe because her love language is words of affirmation), but I try to write to both occasionally because I just never know when those kinds of words will suddenly become important to them! I always look forward to your posts in my inbox too … they are always full of wisdom, encouragement and hope!

  3. Karen Brown says:

    Love this letter! Your girls are blessed to have a mom like you. I love this advice: “When someone you know starts acting differently, there might be a reason that has nothing to do with you. Never forget: hurting people hurt people.” Thanks for sharing this!

    • Lois Flowers says:

      Karen, I wish I had learned that truth when I was a lot younger, so I try to remind my girls of it as much as possible. 🙂 I’m so glad you stopped by today … I have so enjoyed getting to know you through your writing!

  4. Lois,
    What a wonderful and wise letter. Your girls are adorable and I agree with you…I need those same reminders all the time, especially about how much God is for me…your girls are blessed to know they have a mom and a God who is FOR them 🙂

  5. Linda Stoll says:

    Oh, Lois, I always loved that first back to school picture! Your girls are beautiful and your letter to them a real keeper.

    Hugs for you all …

    • Lois Flowers says:

      Sadly (at least for me), the girls don’t wear matching outfits much anymore, and one leaves much earlier than the other for school. So these days, we often forget about taking a first-day-of school picture until it’s too late. But that makes the ones from the past all the more sweeter, I think. Thanks for your encouraging words this morning, Linda.

  6. Wendi (Taylor) weekly says:

    So true! Sage advice from learned experiences. Thank you for this Lois pois!!

    • Lois Flowers says:

      Wendi, I was so happy to see your name in the comments today! And yeah, I suppose I could have done without some of those learning experiences, but then I wouldn’t be able to pass what I learned on to my girls, right? 🙂

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