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Lois Flowers

Lois Flowers

Remembering Eugene Peterson

by Lois Flowers October 23, 2018
by Lois Flowers

Like so many others, my heart has been touched as I’ve read accounts of Eugene Peterson’s last days, final words and spiritual influence.

I appreciate his contributions to Christendom, of course—the 85-year-old retired pastor was the bestselling author of The Message Bible and A Long Obedience in the Same Direction, among many other notable titles.

But the fact that he died shortly after entering hospice care for “advanced and progressing” heart failure and dementia hits much closer to home for me. The way his son Eric described Peterson’s decline doesn’t speak to me merely as someone who is vaguely familiar with his well-known father, but also as a daughter who understands how hard it is to watch a once-vibrant parent go down the sad road of dementia.

A few months ago, I quoted Peterson in a blog post titled “When You’re Not on Fire for Jesus.” The words I included—about worship being an act that develops feelings for God (not the other way around)—appear near the beginning of A Long Obedience.

Ironically, I own this book but had never read it. I pulled the quote from a church bulletin where it was printed at the top of a sermon outline.

But when my blogger friend Michele commented that she had underlined part of the quote I shared in her copy of A Long Obedience to the point where she was “likely to wear through the paper,” I decided it was time I checked the book out for myself.

I couldn’t find my copy, so I requested it from my local library. When it finally came—from a library in San Antonio, of all places—I began a slow and deliberate journey with Peterson through the Psalms of Ascent.

I had recently read Mere Christianity for the first time, and my mind was hungry for another book that emphasized spiritual disciplines and scriptural truths rather than the personal experiences and feelings of the author. A Long Obedience provided exactly that.

It’s amazing to think that this work—subtitled “Discipleship in an Instant Society”—was originally published in 1980, considering how relevant it is to our culture today. I obviously couldn’t mark up the library book, so I took to posting my favorite bits of wisdom and perspective on Twitter.

• From the chapter titled “Providence” (Psalm 121):

“Do you think the way to tell the story of the Christian journey is to describe its trials and tribulations? It is not. It is to name and to describe the God who preserves, accompanies and rules us.”

• On security, or how “God Encircles His People” (Psalm 125):

“My feelings are important for many things. … They keep me aware of much that is true and real. But they tell me next to nothing about God or my relation to God. My security comes from who God is, not from how I feel.”

• The amazing fact that “God sticks with us” (Psalm 129):

“The central reality for Christians is the personal, unalterable, persevering commitment God makes to us. Perseverance is not the result of our determination, it is the result of God’s faithfulness.”

• Quoting Charles Spurgeon in the chapter about humility (Psalm 131):

“It is a blessed mark of growth out of spiritual infancy when we can forgo the joys which once appeared to be essential, and can find our solace in him who denies them to us.”

• Powerful perspective on feelings (Psalm 134):

“Humphrey Bogart once defined a professional as a person who ‘did a better job when he didn’t feel like it.’ That goes for a Christian too. Feelings don’t run the show. There is a reality deeper than our feelings. Live by that.”

I reached the final page of A Long Obedience right around the library’s non-renewable due date. I was sad to part with it; it was one of those books that almost seem like a good friend by the time you’re done with it.

Then yesterday, after learning of Peterson’s death, I looked on my bookshelf and there it was—right in front of me. I don’t know how I missed it before, but I’m looking forward to reading it again, free this time to highlight and underline to my heart’s content.

♥ Lois

There is a reality deeper than our feelings. Live by that. ~ Eugene Peterson Share on X
October 23, 2018 18 comments
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What is God Trying to Teach Me?

by Lois Flowers October 16, 2018
by Lois Flowers

I’ve asked the question. I’ve heard other people ask it. Maybe you’ve even pondered it yourself. What is God trying to teach me through this?

I understand the idea behind the words, but lately, this question has kinda been bothering me. It makes it seem like God is some kind of novice instructor who doesn’t really know the best way to get through to His struggling student.

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October 16, 2018 9 comments
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3 Truths to Encourage Your Heart

by Lois Flowers October 9, 2018
by Lois Flowers

There have been a few occasions lately when I have been hesitant to verbalize my thoughts about God’s faithfulness with friends who are struggling.

I wholeheartedly believe that remembering God’s sovereignty and trustworthiness can encourage us in even the darkest of situations. And yet I’ve hesitated because I don’t want my expression of truth to sound like a cliché, especially to someone who is hurting.

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October 9, 2018 23 comments
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When God’s Plan Doesn’t Seem So Wonderful

by Lois Flowers October 2, 2018
by Lois Flowers

One reality of living close to my aging parents is that my teenage daughters are having to process things that I never even thought about at their age.

It’s one thing for me—a 47-year-old woman who has been struggling to navigate this life of faith for decades—to juggle all the emotional and logistical balls that accompany Alzheimer’s disease and long-term care and recovery from strokes and possible hip replacement surgery and my dad living alone and whatever else the next phone call might bring.

It’s another thing entirely for two girls who love their grandparents dearly—each in her own way—to understand how God could allow such trials and circumstances to infiltrate the lives of two people who only ever sought to serve Him.

I have no explanation for that, at least not one that would satisfy the questions that can swamp the heart of a contemplative granddaughter. I never would have chosen this particular set of sufferings for my parents—not in a million years.

But as a mom who desires to pass on a lasting faith to my children, I am grateful for the opportunities this journey is giving them to confront some unanswerable questions and start learning to trust God when life makes no sense. At this early age, when they have Randy and me right here to comfort them, to guide them and to pray for them.

Because at some point, inevitably, they will face other questions that have no answers. And my prayer is that the processing they’re doing now will lay the groundwork for the way they respond to those questions when they are older.

Life is gritty. Loss is hard. There’s no getting around it, no matter how old you are.

Sometimes the tough stuff that happens to other people really stinks up our own lives. When we love deeply, we also expose ourselves to the real possibility that we are going to hurt deeply.

These realities open the door for us to remind our girls—and ourselves—that while God is good, not everything that happens in our lives makes us happy. He has plans for us—plans for a future and a hope—but nowhere does He promise that His plans will measure up to our definition of wonderful. All things work together for our good, but that doesn’t mean everything that happens to us will seem good—at the time or ever at all.

And yet—despite all of this, and especially in the face of all our unanswerable questions—God remains trustworthy. He has assured us that He will never leave us nor forsake us, no matter where His plans take us.

And, as I’m learning myself and hopefully helping my girls to learn, following Him into the dark unknown is far better than plunging ahead on our own.

♥ Lois

This post is part of a collection called Help for Parent Loss. To read more, please click here.

Life is gritty. Loss is hard. There’s no getting around it, no matter how old you are. Share on X God has assured us that He will never leave us, no matter where His plans take us. Share on X
Photo by Steve Johnson on Unsplash
October 2, 2018 16 comments
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Encouragement for the Encouragers

by Lois Flowers September 25, 2018
by Lois Flowers

A few weeks ago, what we thought was going to be an enjoyable evening of watching our daughter participate in her first full-length cross-country race turned into us helping her leave the race venue after a painful, season-ending injury.

Thanks to a badly dislocated knee, Lilly’s schedule looks very different now than it did a few minutes before the race. Instead of running many miles every day with her teammates, she’s doing physical therapy over lunch and getting her knee iced after school.

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September 25, 2018 28 comments
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In Which We Celebrate 4 Years of Blogging

by Lois Flowers September 18, 2018
by Lois Flowers

A lot can happen in four years.

Four years ago, my teenage daughters were 12 and eight. I was still struggling to figure out how to function best in my earlier-than-normal post-menopausal life. My mom was taking care of my dad more than he was taking care of her.

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September 18, 2018 30 comments
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As long as we’re here on planet Earth, God has a good purpose for us. This is true no matter how old we are, what we feel on any given day or what we imagine anyone else thinks about us. It can be a struggle, though, to believe this and live like it. It requires divine strength and eternal hope. And so I write, one pilgrim to another, in an effort to encourage us both as we navigate the long walk home together.

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