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Lois Flowers

When Everyone Else is Getting the Blessings You Want

by Lois Flowers
by Lois Flowers

Inside: Are your natural desires are interfering with your ability to be content? Try focusing on the blessings outlined in scripture that relate to actions and attitudes rather than material possessions or family status. ~

In our comparison-driven culture, it’s sometimes tempting to think God is pouring out His blessings on everyone but us.

We don’t know the whole story of other people’s lives, of course, or what it has cost them to be where they are and have what they have. But logic like that is often overpowered by our own God-given longings and desires.

When Randy and I were dealing with infertility, for example, it was difficult to hear people gush about how God had blessed them with children, or how their kids were the greatest gifts God had ever given them.

Painful Awareness

Children are wonderful blessings; if they were not, infertility wouldn’t be nearly as hard as it is.

But before God knit our family together through adoption, talk like this frustrated me. It seemed to imply—at least to my own hurting heart—that people without children (married or not) are somehow missing out on the ultimate blessing in life.

I was painfully aware of the scripture passage that talked about children being a heritage from the Lord (Psalm 127:3-5). But I also knew there were plenty of verses in the Bible (especially Psalms and Proverbs) that delineate other reasons for blessing, nearly all of which have to do with a person’s heart, actions, attitudes and relationships with God and others.

Count Them One by One

I made a list of these verses, and if you are longing for a specific blessing that everyone around you already seems to be enjoying, I hope what I found encourages your soul today.

We are blessed when we:

• Refrain from walking in the “counsel of the wicked” or standing “in the way of sinners” or sitting “in the seat of mockers” (Psalm 1:1).

• Delight in the law of the Lord and meditate on it around the clock (Psalm 1:2).

• Take refuge in the Lord (Psalm 34:8).

• Make the Lord our trust (Psalm 40:4).

• Have regard for the weak (Psalm 41:1).

• Learn to acclaim the Lord and walk in His presence (Psalm 89:15).

• Seek Him with all our heart (Psalm 119:2).

• Maintain justice and “constantly do what is right” (Psalm 106:3).

That’s Plenty, but There’s More

We also are blessed when we:

• Are kind to the needy (Proverbs 14:21).

• Are generous to the poor (Proverbs 22:9).

• Are faithful (Proverbs 28:20).

• Honor the Sabbath (Isaiah 56:3).

• Are disciplined by God (Psalm 94:12).

• Find wisdom (Proverbs 3:13).

• Serve others (John 13:11-17).

• Fear the Lord continually (Proverbs 28:14).

• Read the book of Revelation and take its message to heart (Revelation 1:3-4).

• Actively watch for the return of Jesus Christ (Revelation 16:14-15).

Beauty from Ashes

The New Testament also reveals that great blessing often flows out of suffering and pain. Matthew 5:3-12 makes a convincing case for this:

Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted. Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth. Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled. Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy. Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God. Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God. Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.

This familiar passage reminds me of another biblical blessing that has nothing to do with material possessions or family status and everything to do with trusting God through suffering: “Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him” (James 1:12).

In light of eternity, the blessings don’t get any better than that, do they?

♥ Lois

There are plenty of verses in the Bible that delineate other reasons for blessing, nearly all of which have to do with a person’s heart, actions, attitudes and relationships with God and others. Share on X The New Testament also reveals that great blessing often flows out of suffering and pain. Share on X

Note: Parts of this post were adapted from my book Infertility: Finding God’s Peace in the Journey (Harvest House, 2003), available here.

P.S. I’m linking up this week with #tellhisstory, InstaEncouragements, Let’s Have Coffee and Grace & Truth.

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My One Word for 2025

by Lois Flowers
by Lois Flowers

Inside: Reading a wonderfully descriptive travel memoir prompted me to start paying more attention to my own surroundings, a practice that led to my new word of the year. ~

Last fall I read Gather the Olives: On Food and Hope and the Holy Land, a fascinating collection of essays about what author Bret Lott observed and experienced while living and teaching in Israel.

I was struck by the vast number of details Lott weaves into his stories, and it made me wonder how he kept track of all this information throughout his travels. I certainly couldn’t remember all that off the top of my head if I wanted to write about it later.

In the general course of life, my observational skills are mediocre, at best. I mostly notice what I’m interested in—plants and flowers rather than makes and models of cars, for example.

Expanding My Focus

When it comes to writing, I’ve always been more focused on ideas and thoughts rather than environmental details. Even when I worked as a business news reporter, my highest priority was factual accuracy, not color commentary.

But we never know how a book might influence our lives, do we?

I started paying closer attention to my own surroundings after I read Gather the Olives. And I soon realized this was more than a passing fancy. It was only September, but deep down I knew I already had my word for 2025: notice.

I laughed when I noticed this basket of “hedgeballs” for sale at a grocery store in North Dakota. I’d be rich if I could get $1.99 for each of the hedge apples that carpet my patio every fall!

Which Meaning?

When I pick my new words each year, I often don’t know how they will relate to my life or even which form of the word will mean most to me. This time, though, I have a clear sense of the tense I should focus on.

Not notice as a noun relating to information or warning—final notice, two weeks’ notice, post a notice—but as a verb meaning to observe, perceive, acknowledge, discern, spot, recognize or pay attention.

Soon thereafter, a few things I read confirmed I was on the right track. In October, my friend Linda Stoll wrote about waking up early enough to see a glorious sunrise, which led to thoughts about what she had missed by sleeping in, literally and metaphorically.

“It made me wonder,” she explained, “not only how many stunning sunrises I’ve missed along the way, but how many noteworthy scenarios and outstanding miracles have passed me by because I was asleep at the wheel. Or preoccupied with my routines. Or too absorbed by to do-lists and busyness with things that in the light of eternity will have no value at all.”

Paying Attention

It seems almost redundant to say, but we notice more—about everything—when we pay attention. But paying attention well requires us to be fully present. Engaged with what’s right in front of us. Not focused on the future or the past or an electronic device in our hand.

It’s a worthy goal any year, but even more so this year. At least for me.

Atop a lookout tower in a Wisconsin state park, I noticed my niece and I both have watches that ONLY tell time. (I like being an analog girl in a digital world.)

Marching Orders

Since I enjoyed Lott’s writing so much in Gather the Olives, I followed that up with his book Letters and Life: On Being a Writer, On Being a Christian. Here, in a discussion about precision, I found my marching orders for 2025, at least when it comes to my word of the year.

“Precision starts with life,” Lott wrote. “Precision starts with the real. Precision starts in the experiences you yourself have had, and if you want to write—and this is the crux of the whole thing—you better pay attention to what is happening around YOU as a means by which to be precise. You better begin to look, and to see.”

To notice, in other words.

But How?

I’m not necessarily looking to become more descriptive in my writing, but there’s always room for growth and improvement. Notice is bound to have some effect on my words, but it remains to be seen how that will play out.

As I said before, though, I am trying to be more aware of my surroundings.

I suppose I could set a goal to record three observations each day in a little notebook, but that sounds a little too much like work. Instead, I’ll continue to do what I have been doing since my word came to me. Looking up and out rather than down. Paying more attention to the little things around me. Taking a photo when the opportunity arises, but not at the expense of enjoying the moment.

I nearly missed it as I rode past, but I was delighted to notice someone had decorated this little shrub near the bike path for Christmas.

I wrote a grand total of two posts about my word for 2024, so I’m not making any promises this time around. But stay tuned—I may surprise us both with what flows from my year of noticing.

• • •

Have you noticed anything interesting in your life lately? If so, please share in the comments.

♥ Lois

We never know how a book might influence our lives, do we? Share on X Paying attention well requires us to be fully present. Engaged with what’s right in front of us, not focused on the future or the past or an electronic device in our hand. Share on X

P.S. I’m linking up this week with #tellhisstory, InstaEncouragements, Let’s Have Coffee and Grace & Truth.

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A Fresh Look at a Familiar Passage about Trusting God

by Lois Flowers
by Lois Flowers

Inside: Sometimes, the Bible verses we know best are the ones that implant themselves in our minds, play on repeat for days and call us to dig deeper for practical help. ~

If you ask the Internet for the best Bible verses to help you start the new year, Proverbs 3:5-6 will likely be on the list.

It’s well-known and well-loved for good reason; it’s packed with solid truth and instruction. And yet, it’s so familiar we might skim right past when we see or hear it.

Every so often, though, it’s the verses we know best that implant themselves in our minds. They play on repeat for days or weeks, calling us to dig deeper for practical, timely help.

Such was the case for me recently with Proverbs 3:5-6.

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.” (ESV)

Initially, the phrase that jumped out at me was the part about not leaning on your own understanding. At the time, it was my lack of understanding about a technical issue that was frustrating me. I needed guidance, and I wasn’t sure where to get it.

Sound familiar? Those kinds of details are often elusive, especially when it comes to more pressing problems in our lives. But perhaps Proverbs 3:5-6 can encourage us as we wait for answers.

Trusting God with Our Whole Heart

I want to trust in the Lord with all my heart—I really do. I’m guessing you do too. That said, the only way I know to even attempt to reach that goal is to try to trust Him right now, about whatever detail is concerning me this minute.

Step by step. One step at a time.

You know the drill, but the thing about drills is that they develop discipline. Which, as it turns out, seems to be an integral part of trusting God.

Leaning on Divine Understanding

Most of us can access plenty of knowledge about the issues we’re facing. But understanding what to do with all that information? That presents a whole new set of challenges.

God’s wisdom will guide us, though we often forget to ask for it. Or we expect it will arrive in our brains like a full set of blueprints, rather than in bits and pieces, as per usual.

Whatever the case, 2 Chronicles 20:12 is a good place to start: “We do not know what to do but our eyes are on you.” (NIV)

Submitting to Him in All Our Ways

This part is tricky, because while we are often content to submit to God in certain areas, there are others where we prefer to retain control. We think it’s up to us to make it work, or we forget God may have completely different purposes for us.

Proverbs 3:6 doesn’t tell us to submit to Him in some of our ways, though. “All” covers, well, everything. The good news is that we can move in that direction by sharing our hopes, concerns and desires with God in prayer, then following them up with, “Thy will be done.”

He Will Make our Paths Straight

According to GotQuestions.org, this phrase means that “God will align our thoughts, intentions, and actions with His own.” Allowing Him to do this “requires humility and a willingness to surrender our plans and desires to the sovereign will of God.”

That sounds familiar, doesn’t it? While we’d like step-by-step instructions about our latest project, God wants us to become more like Him.

I’m still trying to figure out some of the technical issues I mentioned earlier. But thinking through Proverbs 3:5-6 reminds me—and perhaps you too—that matters of the heart are what really matter.

We can hold everything else loosely, knowing that God will provide the wisdom to complete the work He has for us, whatever that might be.

• • •

Is there a familiar verse that took on greater significance at a particular stage of your life? Please tell us about it in the comments. And a very happy new year to you all!

♥ Lois

The thing about drills is that they develop discipline. Which, as it turns out, seems to be an integral part of trusting God. Share on X While we’d like step-by-step instructions about our latest project, God wants us to become more like Him. Share on X

P.S. I’m linking up this week with Paula at Sweet Tea & Friends, #tellhisstory, InstaEncouragements, Let’s Have Coffee and Grace & Truth.

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One Word Recap: Now

by Lois Flowers
by Lois Flowers

Inside: I didn’t write much about my word for 2024, but it remained at the top of my mind, prompting me to take action when I needed to—or when I may not have otherwise. ~

It’s that time of year, when people who chose a word to guide them for the last 12 months often report on how that went for them.

I’ve been selecting a word of the year since 2015. I’ve worn many of them around my wrist on a bracelet. And some years, especially more recently, I sprinkled posts about my word over the course of 52 weeks.

Not so in 2024, however.

This is only the second time I’ve written about my word, which was now.

It’s kind of ambiguous, now is. There’s no obvious way to illustrate it, or even to give regular updates about what it’s meant in my life.

I guess I’ll put it this way: Throughout the year, now was ever near, prompting me to take action when I needed to, or when I may not have otherwise.

Perhaps the best way to explain it is to share a few examples.

For Starters …

My knee, which had bothered me on and off for months, started yowling in April. Hoping for a quick and easy fix, I made an appointment and went to the doctor.

Instead of the easy fix, she had some blunt words about my X-ray, which prompted me to decide—right then and there—that I was done running. (It was an easy decision, but also difficult, as I described in a post called “Learning to Adjust to an Unexpected and Hard Change”).

Given my love of endorphins, it was clear that I needed to replace running with a different form of exercise. Biking made the most sense for me, so I went to a local cycle shop, picked a used bike out of the few on display and promptly purchased it.

The way I saw it, there was no need to conduct endless research and weigh all the pros and cons of all the various options. The time to make the change was now.

It took me a while to get used to the fact that I’m not running anymore, but I’ve been riding ever since. And in some quiet way, now helped.

Another Example

I had been thinking about attending a writer’s conference for months, maybe years. It had been more than two decades since I had been to one, and the world of publishing has changed drastically since then, to say the least.

I had narrowed my choices down to two conferences, but sometime in late spring, I decided not to go to either. Then, on the last day to get a discounted price for Write to Publish in Wheaton, Ill.—11 days before the conference started—I changed my mind and signed up.

I had never gone to this conference before, and at that point didn’t know anyone else who was going. It was, to put it mildly, a spur-of-the-moment, out-of-my-comfort-zone decision.

Did now make me do it? I can’t say for sure, but it certainly pointed me in that direction.

The conference was enjoyable. It helped me make some good connections and confirmed some steps I need to take if I ever hope to find a publisher for a book I’ve been working on. I’m glad I went.

Now’s the Time

But again, I don’t know if I would have gone if the song of now had not been playing on repeat in my mind and heart. Now’s the time. Do it now. It’s now or never.

In other words, my word reminded me, don’t put off until tomorrow what I can do today.

Not that I’ve listened every time, of course. I’m definitely a creature of habit, and habits are hard to break.

It has helped, though, I can say that.

Today is all we have, after all—now. The people and projects right in front of us might not be there tomorrow.  And sometimes, we need to heed the still, small Voice and take a step or reach out—even if it makes us stretch in new or uncomfortable ways.

Not Done with Now

I’ve chosen a new word for 2025, but as is often the case with my words for each year, I don’t think I’m done with now. And not just because I like my now bracelet and don’t want to stop wearing it.

In a way that is hopeful rather than stressful, it gently reminds me that we all have a limited amount of time left and we best make the most of it. Starting now.

• • •

Do you choose a word for each year? How did your word guide you in 2024? Please share in the comments.

♥ Lois

The people and projects right in front of us might not be there tomorrow. And sometimes, we need to heed the still, small Voice and take a step or reach out. Share on X We all have a limited amount of time left and we best make the most of it. Starting now. Share on X

P.S. I’m linking up this week with One Word 2024, #tellhisstory, InstaEncouragements, Let’s Have Coffee and Grace & Truth.

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Elizabeth’s Life Provides Encouragement for Us All

by Lois Flowers
by Lois Flowers

Inside: The pivotal role Elizabeth played in the Christmas story holds inspiration and instruction for each of us, no matter our age or status in life. ~

If Oscars were handed out to participants in the Christmas narrative, I think Elizabeth deserves the nod for best actress in a supporting role.

The first chapter of Luke tells us that she and her husband, the priest Zechariah, were “righteous in God’s sight.” Sadly, though, “they had no children because Elizabeth could not conceive, and both of them were well along in years.”

This devout Jewish couple had struggled with infertility but had long since given up waiting for a baby because it was biologically impossible. They were too old.

Then One Day …

Zechariah was burning incense before the Lord in the temple and the angel Gabriel appeared to him. The angel told him Elizabeth was going to have a baby, and that the baby would serve as the forerunner to the Messiah.

Though a godly man, Zechariah didn’t believe the angel. As a result, he was struck mute until the baby was born. (I wrote about this last week, in a post titled When Doubt Paves the Way for Hope.)

The angel was right, of course. Elizabeth—despite her age and lack of necessary hormones—conceived and eventually had the child we know as John the Baptist.

In the meantime, she spent considerable time with her relative, Mary, who had recently received her own incredible news from Gabriel.

A Curious Conversation

When the angel appeared to Zechariah, he said, “Do not be afraid, Zechariah, because your prayer has been heard. Your wife Elizabeth will bear you a son and you will name him John.” (Luke 1:13)

His wording intrigues me. I’m guessing this couple’s infertility had caused them great grief when they were younger, and perhaps they still had tender spots in their hearts about the subject. But they were well past the season of praying for a miracle baby.

For God, though, the season of miracles was just beginning. He had heard the prayers they prayed so long ago, and He was answering them now.

If you’re waiting for some kind of divine response this Christmas season, let this encourage your heart. There may be desires that we must hold loosely and even let go because they may not be part of God’s plan for us. But He does hear—and remember—every single prayer.

While it may seem that our prayers our bouncing off the ceiling, they’re not. God will answer—in His way and in His timing.

The Story Continues

After the angel appeared to Mary, the Bible says she “hurried to the town in the hill country of Judah where she entered Zechariah’s house and greeted Elizabeth” (who was in her sixth month of pregnancy).

Further, “When Elizabeth heard Mary’s greeting, the baby leaped inside her and Elizabeth was filled with the Holy Spirit. Then she exclaimed with a loud cry: ‘You are the most blessed of women, and your child will be blessed! How could this happen to me, that the mother of my Lord should come to me?’ ” (Luke 1:41-43)

It would have been easy for Elizabeth to become bitter, angry and disillusioned with God as a result of her infertility, but that doesn’t seem to be what happened to her.

Despite the societal disgrace she experienced, I think she remained wholeheartedly devoted to God in the midst of her pain and disappointment. After all, the words that spilled from her lips when Mary arrived seemed very natural—as if she were used to praising God.

Mary’s Place of Refuge

And did you notice that when the angel appeared to Mary, she hurried to Elizabeth’s house? The Scriptures later say she stayed there for three months, which speaks volumes about the kind of person Elizabeth was. She wasn’t a bitter old shrew, disgruntled at God and everyone else because her life hadn’t turned out the way she thought it should.

She was the person to whom Mary ran when she found out the exciting, troubling, overwhelming, amazing news that she was miraculously pregnant with God’s Son!

Perhaps Mary ran to Elizabeth because she knew Elizabeth would believe her, not cast judgment on her. She knew Elizabeth would praise God with her, and she knew Elizabeth would encourage and support her—all in the quiet safety of her home.

God’s Purposes

Why on earth did God make Elizabeth wait so long to fulfill her dream of motherhood? Why did He choose her to give birth to John the Baptist, the forerunner of the Messiah?

We don’t know the answers to these questions. We only know what happened as a result of her situation, and how it was used in the lives of others.

Just after Gabriel told Mary how it was possible for her to be pregnant, he added this: “And consider your relative Elizabeth—even she has conceived a son in her old age, and this is the sixth month for her who was called barren. For nothing will be impossible with God.” (Luke 1:36)

Right after that, Mary rushed to Elizabeth’s house and spent those three months under her nurturing wing. How important it must have been for the young, unmarried Mary to spend that time with another recipient of God’s miraculous grace at that specific time in her life.

Granted, Elizabeth was carrying Zechariah’s baby and Mary was carrying God’s Son. But they both found themselves in extremely unusual situations.

Not About Us

Had God answered Elizabeth’s prayers earlier in her life, she would have missed out on many blessings. Not the least of which was the opportunity to encourage the mother of the Messiah! Maybe, just maybe, her wait for a baby had more to do with Mary than with herself.

And maybe, just maybe, the same is true for us. Perhaps there are times in our lives when God allows us to experience things primarily so that we can be a piece of someone else’s puzzle.

Here’s another way of putting it:

Sometimes, our seasons in the waiting room are not about us. They’re all about how God wants to use us and our experiences to help someone else.

“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.” ~ 2 Corinthians 1:3-4

♥ Lois

While it may seem that our prayers our bouncing off the ceiling, they’re not. God hears and He will answer—in His way and in His timing. Share on X Sometimes, our seasons in the waiting room are not about us. They’re all about how God wants to use us and our experiences to help someone else. Share on X

P.S. I’m linking up this week with #tellhisstory, InstaEncouragements, Let’s Have Coffee and Grace & Truth.

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