Blog “Identity Crisis” Prompts Deeper Questions

The week I turned 50, my blog had an identity crisis. I’ll spare you the techie details; let’s just say that, between the original problem and the mistakes I made trying to fix it, I wasted a great deal of time I could have spent doing any number of more productive things.

I’m not telling you this to drag you down into the weeds of blogging with me, but rather, to share that this identity crisis with my blog sort of triggered—or maybe just exacerbated—a bit of an identity crisis in my own heart.

In the days leading up to my birthday on Nov. 5, I wasn’t sure how I was going to feel about turning 50. Early in the week, I was fine. But with all the uncertainty about the election, on top of uncertainty about loved ones suffering from Covid, on top of wondering what the next chapter of my life is going to look like, I went into a bit of a funk.

Then the blog situation happened, and it only got worse.

For a while, it even prompted me to question whether six years of blogging has been worth it and whether I even want to keep writing at all.

I pretty quickly arrived at the conclusion that it has been worth it and I do want to keep writing. But the soul-searching continues.

In 2019, I wrote a lot about grief, and what it was like to lose both of my parents within five weeks of each other. While I tried to make general applications, it was very personal.

I’ve read that it’s best to write about such seasons after the fact, rather than in the middle of them. Maybe that’s the best way to grow a blog, but for me, it was helpful and healing to write through it.

Death and grief are not fun topics to read about on a consistent basis, however, and traffic on my blog—which was pretty light to begin with—went down that year.

Many of you hung in there with me, though. Maybe it was because you’re related to me, or you’ve known me since I was a teenager. Or perhaps it was because what I was writing gave voice to what you have thought or experienced. Whatever the case, I’m enormously grateful for you.

Readership has rebounded a bit since then, but all of this does bring up—at least in my mind—the issue of faithfulness.

It’s sometimes tempting to believe that, if we are faithful with small assignments or responsibilities, God will automatically give us larger ones. That might be a popular motivational message in some Christian circles, but the Bible makes no such promise.

While it does say, “The one who is faithful in a very little thing is also faithful in much.” (Luke 16:10a, NASB), I believe this has more to do with integrity (doing the right thing no matter how big or small the job is) than with some sort of strategy for gaining influence or achieving success.

No matter what the cheerleaders and business coaches on Instagram say, there’s simply no guarantee that faithfulness in small things will lead to bigger and better things. But we still need to be faithful in the small things, right?

I think so.

Only God knows the true value of anything we might do. This applies to teachers, nurses, entrepreneurs, homemakers, bloggers, speakers, pastors, politicians, engineers, social media influencers, students and any other role we might find ourselves in.

What seems inconsequential to us might be huge to someone else. What looks impressive in the here and now—in today’s celebrity, platform-driven culture—might not be all that significant in light of eternity.

It may be, but impressing others should never be our focus and our goal. Whatever our current assignment or calling, Colossians 3:23 tells us to “do it enthusiastically, as something done for the Lord and not for men.”

Maybe you’ve reached that sweet spot where talent, opportunity and passion intersect, and you are joyfully achieving all your personal hopes and dreams. Or maybe you’re not sure what the long-term future holds for you and you’re just happy to complete one day’s worth of work at a time.

If you find yourself in the latter group with me, the Apostle Paul has some words of encouragement for the both of us. “Let us not become weary in doing good,” he writes, “for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.” (Galatians 6:9, NIV)

Hang in there, my friends. Faithfulness in the small things is still faithfulness. And some day—in this life or perhaps the next—God will reward us for it.

♥ Lois

P.S. I’m linking up this week with #tellhisstory, InstaEncouragements, Recharge Wednesday, Let’s Have Coffee, Inspire Me Monday, #HeartEncouragement and Grace & Truth.

Photo by Jian Xhin on Unsplash.