Inside: What made me decide to get hearing aids when I was only 50, and how this can help you make a hard change too.

“I can hear, I just can’t make out what they’re saying.”

When my dad would say this, it used to drive me batty. If you can’t hear, you can’t hear, right?

Well, um … not exactly.

How I Learned This

My path to hearing-loss empathy began in my mid 40s when I noticed I was asking people to repeat themselves quite a lot. Especially my daughter Molly, who has a softer, higher-pitched voice.

I got my ears checked. A few years later, I got them checked again. Both exams showed some hearing loss but not enough to warrant correction.

By last summer, though, I was struggling to hear even more, and not just when Molly was talking. The audiologist discovered that one of my ears was completely full of wax. Clearing that out helped, but not completely.

Dad was Right

Turns out, my dad was on to something. I could hear people talking, but sure enough, I couldn’t make out what they were saying. (Ironic, I know. Which is often how these things go, I’ve found.)

At first, the thought that I needed hearing aids to correct a 25-percent loss in both ears made me feel old. I was only 50 at the time. That might seem ancient to my 17-year-old daughter, but in the grand scheme of life, it’s still pretty young.

What Made Me Do It

Eventually, I decided my own feelings about feeling—and possibly looking—older didn’t matter as much as my desire to hear better. I got a set of hearing aids, and—to paraphrase Robert Frost—they have made all the difference.

At restaurants. When talking with friends who have quiet voices. Outside, where cardinals and wind chimes and little chirpy animals sound so much brighter and clearer.

Even church worship services are more enjoyable, because I can actually hear myself sing again. (I didn’t realize I had lost this ability until I got it back.)

2 Takeaways

As I think about all of this a year later, I have a few thoughts to share.

First of all, if you have loved ones with hearing loss, please remember that it’s not their fault. If they have hearing aids and don’t wear them, that’s frustrating, for sure. But if they simply can’t hear, or can’t hear well even with correction, try to be patient and understanding with them.

I say this as a person who used to get hugely annoyed at my parents when they couldn’t hear me. It took me going to the hearing aid place with my dad, watching him get fitted for a new device for his one working ear and having the audiologist say that his hearing was the best it was going to get, for me to finally realize he truly was hearing as well as he could.

Take it from Me

I wish I had come to this realization much sooner. But perhaps someone else can learn from my experience and avoid some unnecessary aggravation in the moment, as well as regret later on.

Hearing loss is part of aging—a decline we often watch our parents go through and then eventually experience ourselves. I started the process prematurely, as is my custom. But I’m thankful I took the brave (for me) step and got the hearing aids.

That said, my encouragement to you is this. No matter your age, if there is help available for a condition or issue that is bothering you, don’t be afraid to do something about it.

Make the appointment. Take the test. Stop putting it off.

Nothing Changes if Nothing Changes

Sometimes, acceptance is what’s called for, rather than a prolonged fight for answers. But whether it’s hearing loss or something else, if it’s possible for you to get better or stronger, it won’t happen by osmosis.

It often takes a bit of humility to admit you need help. But when you do, and your loved ones see you making an effort, it also sets an example to them of how to grow older gracefully.

I’m guessing my daughters aren’t thinking about any of that, however. They’re just glad they don’t have to repeat everything they say to me anymore.

♥ Lois

P.S. I’m linking up this week with Sweet Tea & Friends, #tellhisstory, InstaEncouragements, Recharge Wednesday, Let’s Have Coffee and Grace & Truth.

Photo by Anna Kaminova on Unsplash