Lois Flowers

Inside: Especially nowadays, many of us could use some help relating to our fellow believers. An essay from my dad’s files offers guidance in the form of a unique analogy. ~

My dad loved old cars. I’m not talking about cool classics from the 1950s, although he enjoyed those too.

I’m referring to decidedly not-cool cars like the Rambler Americans from the 1960s he drove when I was a teenager in the 1980s. (Can you guess how I felt about this at the time?)

Dad was a mechanical engineer who could fix pretty much anything. One of the reasons he appreciated these old cars was because he could repair them when they broke down, which seemed to be quite often. (Or at least that’s how I remember it.)

Because of all this, I wasn’t surprised when I came across an essay in his files called “Things I Learned from Driving Old Cars.” It read like it could have been presented as a Sunday school lesson, although I don’t know if he ever shared it in that venue.

Practical Analogy

My dad’s goal, I think, was to encourage believers to make every effort to get along with each other. And, as was his custom, he used a practical analogy with some humor thrown in to get his message across.

“I hope you are not offended when I compare old cars to people,” Dad wrote, “but since I like both, you will understand it is not a derogatory comparison.”

I’m guessing most of us could use some guidance about how to relate to other believers nowadays. So here, lightly edited to fit blog style, is an excerpt from his essay.

• • •

“If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men.” (Romans 12:18, KJV)

Most of us probably interpret this verse to mean, “Do the best you can to get along with people and try to stay out of fights.” But when we consider the verses immediately before and after, we see it means much, much more.

Tools for Getting Along

In fact, Romans 12 is nothing less than a full complement of tools for our use in working together effectively with each other. Take verse 10, for example:

“Be kindly affectioned one to another with brotherly love; in honor preferring one another.” (emphasis added)

Can you imagine a church where everyone practiced this verse? A place where nobody is on an ego trip, there are no personal agendas, and people don’t contend for positions of power and prestige?

It boggles the mind, doesn’t it? And here is where old cars come in.

My dad working on his first car, a 1949 Crosley. According to notes in a family photo album, this picture was taken in 1954. Many years later, my dad told me he bought the car when he was 20 and paid about $150 for it.

Personality Quirks

When a car is in its second or third 100,000 miles, it seems to develop its own distinctive personality. On one of my cars, for instance, you had to shift gears a certain way or the transmission would lock up and it wouldn’t go at all. I learned how to do that, and even my wife learned, and we both got many good miles out of that car.

People have these personality quirks too. We have to be willing to accommodate them, not only to get along with them but also to work effectively with them.

We may need to avoid certain words or phrases when talking with certain people. Or it may mean listening to someone tell that story for the 59^th time without rolling our eyes. We might laugh or at least smile, even if we could say the punch line better ourselves.

I know it’s easier and certainly less time consuming to not have to deal with people like that, but should that be our priority?

Realistic Expectations

Another lesson to learn from driving old cars is that you develop a realistic set of expectations. You know your old jalopy won’t be able to go from a dead stop to 60 miles per hour in six seconds, if it ever could. And those little dents, scratches and rust spots mean your beloved vehicle no longer attracts admiring glances, except maybe those of amazement that such an old car would still be driven in public.

This teaches us that our expectations of other believers should be realistic too. We tend to have high expectations of others, don’t we? They should be just like us, only better. That’s not realistic, though.

So how do we form realistic expectations about our fellow Christians? You get to know old cars by spending time with them, usually by driving them. When you spend time with people, you find out things about them too—their likes and dislikes, strengths and weaknesses, aspirations and fears.

With that kind of information, you can form some pretty accurate expectations too.

Like my dad, my husband Randy also has an affinity for old jalopies. His first car, shown here in a photo from the late 1980s, was a 1964 Ford Falcon Futura.

Wear and Tear

The third thing about old cars is that special attention must be given to the effects of wear and tear. Oil is consumed, coolant leaks, and unknown parts rattle and squeak.

Humans don’t do any of those things, of course. But Christians who have done battle with the enemy may also need some extra care and attention at times. They won’t need oil or antifreeze like those old cars, but perhaps a sympathetic, listening ear during a period of discouragement, or a bright, cheerful card or letter—even if it isn’t Christmas or their birthday—might do the trick.

And how many Christians complain that nobody at church talks to them? We could be the ones who do.

Don’t Take the Easy Way

Some people don’t want to deal with this sort of thing, either with cars or with people. So they buy new cars and ignore those folks who they think require too much attention.

Now I don’t really expect you to become an old-car enthusiast. Buy that new car if you really want to. (Someone has to stimulate the economy, right?)

But even though it’s often easiest to limit our circle of friends to those we are comfortable with, I don’t think the scriptures support that option, unless we are willing to cut Romans 12:9-21 out of our Bibles and throw it away.

On second thought, don’t do that. Instead, read this passage again and ask yourself if you are doing everything it tells you to do. And if you aren’t, then do it!

• • •

There you have it—my dad’s exhortation to read and apply Romans 12:9-21 (which, in the NIV, is appropriately titled “Love in Action”). If you enjoyed his thoughts, let me know in the comments. And if you have any old-car enthusiasts in your life, please share this post with them too.

♥ Lois

P.S. I’m linking up this week with #tellhisstory, InstaEncouragements, Let’s Have Coffee and Grace & Truth.